10.10.10

That's something.

I'm loosing my thoughts. I'm seriously going to start carrying a notebook with me in one of my hands and write every single one of it, when it comes to me.

While walking today it came to me - how different I feel. Better. In many ways.... Maybe This Is It. That Something what was missing all this time... Maybe now I really have what it takes to turn part of my life round.... Don't know... Don't want to actaully... I never know what I want and what I don't want. And it's anoying.

Have you ever had a feeling like you are like an Amusement Park? You know? Like you are some kinda entertainment or something? I have. I'm having. Sometimes I feel like I'm an attraction to the guys here. I do realise that, our town ain't the best place to crash and hang out, but why do they have to make me feel like I'm a new exhibit in a museum... I know maybe they have some questions they'd like to ask, but you don't have to tread me like a creature you see for the first and last time in your life... But on the other hand... It's kinda fun...

Okey.. So it's ten minutes after eleven in the evening on Sunday... Great...

I just hope everything won't go down for me...